[Fwd: Internet Message]

[David V. Rogers]

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Date: Sat, 16 May 1998 12:18:53 +0100
From: Wayne Osentoski <ozzy-o@worldnet.att.net>
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To: Jacqueline Oliver <oliver_jackie@bah.com>,
        Jeff & Judy Grann <SuccesWare@aol.com>,
        Dave Rogers <dvrogers@bellatlantic.net>,
        Carl Creager <Carl.Creager@ost.dot.gov>,
        Nick Hirsch <njhirsch@crosslink.net>, Lois Rogers <Lomarie@erols.com>,
        Chris Ondrus <chris_ondrus_at_admin@mail.bethsoft.com>,
        Sophie Ondrus <sophiepc@worldnet.att.net>,
        Gail Larkin <gail.larkin@worldnet.att.net>
Subject: Internet Message
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ENJOY THIS ONE

You Know You Have a Problem When...

1.     You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and  stop to
check your e-mail on the way back to bed.

2.     You get a tattoo that reads "This body best viewed with
Netscape Navigator 1.1 or higher."

3.     You name your children Eudora, Mozillia and Dotcom.

4.     You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling,
like you just pulled the plug on a  loved one.

5.     You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your
lap...and your child in the overhead compartment.

6.     You decide to stay in college for an additional year or two,
just for the free Internet access.

7.     You laugh at people with 9600-baud modems.

8.     You start using smileys in your snail mail.

9.     Your hard drive crashes. You haven't logged in for two
hours.

10.    You start to twitch.

11.    You pick up the phone and manually dial your ISP's access
number.

12.    You try to hum to communicate with the modem... and you
succeed.

13.    You find yourself typing "com" after every period when
using a word processor.com

14.    You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.

15.    You start introducing yourself as "JohnDoe at AOL dot com.

16.    All of your friends have an @ in their names.

17.    Your cat has its own home page.

18.    You can't call your mother... she doesn't have  a modem.

19.    You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you
check it again.

20.    Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.

21.    You don't know what sex three of your closest friends are,
because they have neutral nicknames and you never bothered to ask.

22.    You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before
you landscape.

23.    You tell the cab driver you live at
http://1000.edison.garden/house/brick.html

23.    You start tilting your head sideways to smile.


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